Botched Movie
Storyline
TAGLINES
And you thought you were unlucky?
Russian Mafia, insane hostages, twin serial killers... Ritchie Donovan's luck has run out.
Ritchie Donovan (Dorff) is a professional thief whose luck has just run out. The only survivor from a heist that goes terribly wrong, Ritchie is forced to take the rap and is sent to Russia to steal a priceless antique cross locked in a safe on the penthouse floor of a Moscow skyscraper. Things start badly and go rapidly downhill when, during the robbery, Ritchie and his Russian accomplices are forced to take hostages because they are trapped by the police on the unused 13th floor.
| Stephen Dorff | Ritchie Donovan |
| Jaime Murray | |
| Sean Pertwee | Groznyi |
| Jamie Foreman | Peter |
| Geoff Bell | Boris |
| Edward Baker-Duly | Killer |
| Igor Chistol | Thug 1 |
| David Heap | Auctioneer |
| Greg Jeloudov | Thug 2 |
| Zak Maguire | Alex |
| Hugh O'Conor | Dmitry |
| Russell Smith | Yuri |
| Alan Smyth | Hugo |
| Bronagh Gallagher | |
| Gene Rooney | Katerina |
| Kit Ryan |
6.00 out of 10 (571 votes)
Visitor Reviews
Lacking everything but mock blood
posted on 06 Aug 2009Announced as humorous splatter movie on the DVD cover this sounded like a good film to view on a Friday evening.The first minutes were quite fun but from there on it went downhill. Jokes were too simplistic and the plot deteriorated so dramatically that we had to switch to fast forward - otherwise we would not have made it through to the end.Characters were mostly reduced to clichés - or their obvious deconstructions: the alpha guy is really a beta version who did not get enough brains. Well, that's a common caricature completely lacking esprit.Waste your time on this one only if you are completely out of alternatives. 2 stars for the funny beginning.
starts out as an average crime comedy thriller and turns into a comedy horror Splatter fest
posted on 23 Jul 2009Wow this one really caught me by surprise wasn't expecting much from it and it has turned out to be one of the gems of the year in my eyes what starts out as an average crime comedy thriller and turns into a comedy horror Splatter fest it's genius and by far the best thing stephen dorf's been involved with in years.For those of you not familiar with this stephen dorf plays a guy who owes a Russian mobster big time and keeps cocking up heists and is given one more chance to steal a cross in Russia with 2 even more bumbling sidekicks which leads to a hostage situation from there onwards it unravels into a weird blend of of hostage movie / slasher flick with serial killers death traps and lunatic hostages.
excellent low budget movie
posted on 09 Jul 2009I watched this movie last night not knowing what to expect and have to say this was one of the funniest slasher movies I have seen for a long time. I think You need to watch this movie twice or more to appreciate the subtlety in the humour. camp? yes, a good helping of gore, and some excellent larger than life characters. Boris and Yuri had potential as the new morecambe and wise of horror. I don't know what the other people commenting were expecting (or indeed watching) but my wife and I laughed throughout. A great deadpan performance form stephen dorff and the beautiful Jaime Murray. Take a chance and see this movie. All in all a great watch and a lot of fun.
huge let down
posted on 27 Jun 2009Ritchie (Stephen Dorff of Feardotcom, and Alone in the Dark shame) stars in this dreary unfunny ;horror-comedy as Richie, a professional thief who can't seem to catch a break and is trapped on the 13th floor during a botched heist of a jeweled cross in Russia. He and his thieving co-horts must survive the serial killer that lies in waiting as the spit hits the fan all around them.Horror-comedies are notoriously hard to pull off, if one errs to either side the whole film falls like a deck of cards. Sadly this is the case here as the humor falls flat on it's face and there isn't really any horror to speak of. You could almost see where the makers of the movie wanted to do, but in execution they really botched it.My Grade: D+
A bloody,grisly, comic horror tale that is actually funny.
posted on 15 Jun 2009This is the directors first effort at making a film. Kit Ryan is the name,I definitely want to see what else he (or she) can do.He Knew that the story was as silly as you could get, He wisely had has cast play there roles as straight as they could, thusly there are many laughs, Its easy then to ignore the grizzlier & bloodier scenes. when you can laugh. It remanded me of the old cheap horror movies from Monogram & Ed.Wood. Another title could be FUBAR, If by chance you do not know what this means, ask an older person.Stephen Dorff is the star & the only recognizable actor, he does quite well, The entire cast does well,in fact with this funny material,It is not a great film by any means,its not supposed to be. I enjoyed it & I think you will as well.Ratings **1/2 (out of 4)++ 77 points (out of 100) IMDb 7 (out if 10)++ NOTE; for a b-horror movie this is a HIGH rating.
Not for me at all.
posted on 13 Jun 2009Botched starts as Ritchie (Stephen Dorf) is involved in a car accident after just having robbed an auction house of valuable diamonds, not wanting to be arrested Ritchie flees the accident sans the diamonds. Mr. Groznyl (Sean Pertwee) who Ritchie works for is not happy that he lost the diamonds but decides to give Ritchie one more chance, he orders Ritchie to go to Moscow & steal an ancient gold Crucifix. However things again go wrong & Ritchie finds himself trapped on a skyscraper floor with two of Groznyl's men & a bunch of hostages as he tries to figure out what to do in order to get out of the building alive & without being arrested but there is someone else there too, a psycho killer who starts to kill everyone off...This German, Irish, British & American co-production was directed by Kit Ryan & seems to be one of those films that divides opinion, some seem to love it's bizarre sense of humour & madcap plot while other's like me think it's a complete mess that fails at everything it sets out to do. I heard lots of views that that say there's lots of twists but I thought the story was predictable & the ending in particular was an unclear mess that was too eager to get the two main male & female leads together. I heard many people say that Botched is funny & again I just can't see it, the humour is so obvious & poorly staged that there's more laughs during the average funeral. The whole film is terrible, the plot is just rubbish, the gore is minimal & the so-called comedy is just awful. I don't think I laughed once. The character's are silly one dimensional idiots, there are plot holes galore & there's even a terrible ending, the story, the character's & villains are just not engaging enough. The whole thing plays like a cross between a gangster flick like Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels (1998), a bare-bones slasher flick & some madcap Police Academy farce where stupid character's get into stupid situations & the whole thing just escalates, or so the makers would have hoped. Unfortunately the gangster elements are poor & barely figure, the horror elements amount to a few silly death's & the comedy is just so unfunny. So what we have is Botched a horror comedy where both the horror & comedy is of the poorest sort. I saw it on telly for free & I still feel ripped-off.This is quite well made although the constant grey corridors get boring. There's no real excitement & there's definitely no scares, tension or suspense as the silly moronic comedy is so distracting & in your face. The gore isn't even all that, someones head if chopped off, there's spikes through feet, a fridge of guts, dead bodies hanging up, a chopped off hand gag & a decent amount of fake blood but Botched never really goes for it in either the horror or gore department.Apparently shot in Ireland & in Russia the film looks nice enough with good production values. The acting is terrible, the accents are beyond irritating & annoying & look closely at leading Man Stephen Dorf because he looks totally bewildered at what's going on with a sort of stoned look on his face in most scenes. A special mention goes to Jaime Foreman who has to have put in the worst single performance in a film I have seen in a long time.Botched is what it says it is, a totally botched attempt at a modern madcap horror crime gangster comedy that was terrible on all counts. Some people seem to like it & that's fair enough but for me Botched was awful.
My low expectations weren't satisfied
posted on 07 Jun 2009I really expected more of this movie after reading a couple of reviews, but I must say that I was really disappointed. What a waste of time.. yeah, there is gore, blood, intestines and so on (which I like) but this movie is all in all more or less pretty crappy... Not that I expected it to be "deep" in any way, but this movie, as a low level entertainment, bored me quite fast. I started skipping to the gory parts after I've seen half of the movie, and even these couldn't make up for waiting.3 stars for the gore, everything else more or less sucks... Thought at least Stephen Dorff would be good, cause I like him (sometimes) but nothing positive to say here neither...Its not funny enough for a stupid movie and its not violent enough for a gore movie.
Entertaining and Forgettable Dark Comedy
posted on 10 Apr 2009While escaping from a successful heist of diamonds in an auction house for the Russian mobster lord Mr. Groznyi (Sean Pertwee), the driver of the runaway car crashes a wall and only the thief Ritchie Donovan (Stephen Dorff) survives. He runs with the wallet full of diamonds, but he is hit by a car and loses the stones on the street. The upset Mr. Groznyi sends Ritchie to Moscow to compensate his mistake and steal an ancient and valuable cross in the penthouse of a building with the clumsy Russian brothers Peter (Jamie Foreman) and Yuri (Russell Smith). However the plan goes wrong and Ritchie and his partners take a group of passengers from the elevator as hostage to the 13th floor. They negotiate with the police, but when they release the first hostage in good faith, they discover that their negotiator is not from the police but an evil serial-killer, beginning their night of terror trapped on the floor.The gore "Botched" is an entertaining and forgettable dark comedy. The weird story has funny and silly moments, but something is missing to make "Botched" a cult-movie or at least a great movie. The jokes do not work well and it is strange to see the bizarre "Russian" characters speaking in English. The daughter of Billy Murray, Jaime Murray, is extremely sexy in the role of the executive Anna and shows a great chemistry with Stephen Dorff. My vote is six.Title (Brazil): "13o Andar" ("!3th Floor")
Dorff does grade school project films now?
posted on 08 Apr 2009I don't know why but I quite like Mr Dorff as an actor but man does he get into some crummy films. This would be one of those films. his talents were way past the level of writing and directing of this film. It may well have had some good ideas in it but they were all messed up in delivery or their effect watered down by chunks of really bad story that preceded it.Jaime Murray was OK too, she looked good and kept her mouth shut most of the time so you couldn't blame her for the lame dialog or story.This looked and felt like the sort of home movie you'd do if you and a bunch of friends decided to make a film and make it up as you went along. Theatre sports with a vague concept.My feeling after watching this movie was I wish I'd spent the time on doing something else.And Dorff, fire your agent NOW!, pull something good out of the hat why don't you!, or you'll be the next mickey rourke, if you're not already. (so much promise after angel heart, but what did he do with his career???)
Really really bad movie
posted on 15 Mar 2009Is this a comedy, a thriller or a horror movie. According to me, having actually looked at the entire movie. It's neither. It's just a really bad movie, terrible acting, terrible script and a complete waste of time. Perhaps my humor is whats wrong. But seeing this film together with my wife, who got tired from it after just fifteen minutes. We both agree that this film deserve the lowest vote possible. We didn't understand the meaning of the movie, couldn't understand why this film was ever made. So it's absolutely not a thriller or a horror movie. We really don't see this as a comedy. It reminds us more of a school project, without a budget, lots of inexpensive red paint and second hand clothes. Who should see it? We really can't say.
Amazing stuff...
posted on 09 Dec 2008So, after i-don't-know-how-many years of being a reader of IMDb, after having seen this... film, i just felt compelled to comment for the first time. It's a sorry mess. And i mean really a mess. Not a single thing works in it, not one. I didn't feel interested at any time. Didn't smile for once. Didn't feel a thing, if it was not just amazed at the sheer stupidity of it all. It starts in France, where the french speak French, and moves to Russia where, in all logic, the Russian speak English between each other... with a Russian accent. It starts off with some jewelery robbery, and proceeds to a bad, bad slasher comedy. As i said, nothing works. Everybody's brain dead, the logic is thrown down the Russian drain, and it just drags on like the dummy rats that it showcases as the summum of special effects. What saddens me most is the evident budget that could have been used for someone with a minimum of talent to make a film worthy of existence. It was not even bad in a good way, just downright lame. The only worthy mention (with my appreciation that is) was the rather exotic looking Jaime Murray, with no more skin showed than her pretty face. That is to say how much i searched for an escape...Amazing stuff. That it got made at all, that is.
Unashamedly Fun B-Movie
posted on 27 Nov 2008This movie starts out relatively straight with a diamond heist that goes wrong. Everything seemingly normal and slightly tedious, I thought.The film then slides slowly by inches down the path towards B-movie insanity. The odd thing is, the weirder, gorier and more ridiculous things get, the funnier and more enjoyable it becomes as well.This is not a dumb film and there is a consistent and thought out story that appears on film, despite the odd silly "rubber chicken" prop moment.I didn't have any qualms about the acting as the cast did a fantastic job staying in (dodgy Russian) character.Whilst Brad does a good job keeping the audiences sympathy, supported ably by the very foxy Jamie Murray, a horror movie is only as good as its villains. They don't disappoint and for me are the real stars of this movie with Boris the security guard running a very close second.
Fantastic B movie with some genuine LOL moments
posted on 18 Oct 2008I thoroughly enjoyed this film. I am a massive fan of the horror/b movie genre dating back to Evil Dead days, and this movie didn't disappoint. With a superb cast of non-Russian speaking actors, it was well done. The twists in this movie are well thought out and dare I say original for once. And the humor, well, it doesn't come any blacker than that. I was most impressed by the gore factor, it wasn't massively over the top like others make it out to be, i was quite surprised by how they sometimes went with "less is more" logic. Very well orchestrated.A well chosen movie by Stephen Dorff. Keep them coming mate.9/10
Splatstick for Gore Hounds
posted on 28 Sep 2008I saw the movie at it's premiere at the Fantasy Filmfest in Munich, Germany, and I have to say it's very entertaining.The movie itself is not a masterpiece by means of production design, acting, editing, directing or anything else. It is more in the B to C category. Trash, that is. But it is not at all pretending to be anything else. Just the other way around, it embraces it's trashiness by having the villain jumping around in ballet-like moves and similar things. This is one thing that makes this movie very likable. The other is that it is just so funny. If you are not offended by extreme violence and gore.The theater was packed with the special kind of audience that is attracted to the Fantasy Film Fest, the kind of audience that will applaud and cheer when a head gets cut off and gallons of blood get poured around. But the cheering didn't stop there. As soon as the audience got into the movie, and got over an initial impression of crappiness (like a very rudimentary set, bad editing with scenes that were often just a bit too long and actors that were, with the exception of Stephen Dorff, sub par), it became clear to them that the movie is intended as a comedy and delivered funny and unexpected scenes one after another. And the laughter continued throughout the whole movie.I really enjoyed the movie a lot, and in retrospect did not notice that it was actually 100 minutes long (although cutting 10 minutes off would have helped).For it's great entertainment value (and isn't that what movies are all about ? ) I give 7 points. I cannot give less to a movie that I enjoyed so much, even if it has a lot of shortcomings on the technical side.
Great Comedy !!
posted on 04 Sep 2008This movie was a pleasant surprise ! Jamie Forman as Peter was excellent, he gave some real great laughs. I think Jamie has a real nick for comedy and he should do more of it. It was a well acted and was a nice black comedy. The actors were all very convincing with their accents. I never knew they were Hollywood actors and in fact took them to be Russian actors. Till i saw their profiles on IMDb. Please do not believe those bad reviews and watch this movie. I am sure you would enjoy it. Hopefully we would get more projects like this from the Director.Great Effort! Thanks for this fabulous movie.I will give it a conservative 7.
abominable shaun-of-the-dead wannabe
posted on 08 Jul 2008This was one of the worst movies in recent history. Not funny. Not clever. Not sarcastic, ironic, tongue-in-cheek, or spoofy. Just uneven, juvenile, boring, and embarrassing. I feel dirty. Brain cells dying. Will need to watch Shaun of the Dead 16 times to bring IQ back up to normal human level. Seriously: if you were expecting a horror movie, it's not. If you were expecting a comedy - not. Thriller - not. Mystery - not. Gore-fest? Well, sure, if you consider jiggly fake rats and a closet full of bloody mannequins that theoretically resemble recently-departed cast members gory. Remember the guys down the hall from your dorm room that were always stoned, and thought they were really funny? Well, they convinced someone to let them make a movie, complete with fart jokes and fake limbs. Pray they never convince anyone again. (Did I mention, really, really, terrible effects?). If you want a funny, gross, scary gore-fest, try Peter Jackson's Dead-Alive.
Very good!
posted on 08 Jun 2008It's screamingly low budget (the sets for 90% of the movie show that) and there are only really 2 stars (Sean Pertwee & Steven Dorff) but the movie is excellent. A robbery gone wrong leads to the robber having to do a "final" job to pay-off a long standing family debt to a Russian Mobster from a building in Moscow.The robbery is bungled and the 3 robbers are forced to take hostages but we soon find the floor they've taken refuge on isn't quite all it seems.The film is gory, violent and darkly funny. There are lots of recognisable faces in the support cast (like Yuri & the twin sister). Mainly shot in a studio on Ireland this is very good but I'm not sure it'd stand up to more than 1 viewing as once you've seen it all the shocks and surprises have been revealed.Good.
Botched.......Yes this film was totally botched
posted on 29 Apr 2008This was horrific, i cannot actually believe i managed the whole movie.Where do i start on this tale of woe, the film basically centres around a "Botched" Robbery in a hotel and the cast arrive at a floor that nobody knows about which has a killer running around murdering all and sundry.The running around is by far the worst i have encountered. There were more chase scenes than a Bond film but these had a ring to the old TV series Benny Hill. I honestly expected the killer to grab someones backside and eventually the Benny Hill music playing in the background. I don't want to even get started on the killer it was a cross between the Highlander & Rocky. Rocky because Rocky sounded more Russian than this guy.The Russian accents were laughable, the only thing the film lacked here was each cast member playing a Russian to have a bottle of vodka and one of those woolly hats all KGB agents have in classic soviet union movies.This film has got to be the worst film i have seen in years. Please do not listen to these Muppet's stating its not pretending to be art house but plays to its strengths, total rubbish. It does not matter which way you describe this, the movie is total pap.I shall leave it with one last comment. You are cornered the main character and the piece of eye candy, The killer enters the room with his sword and blood everywhere, you are hiding behind the curtain with say 10 bodies hanging from hooks, you are scared and the killer is about to find you so what do you do............... Well i would run like hell but no Stephen Dorff is way too cool for that, he snogs her.In Conclusion WHY oh WHY oh WHY oh WHY
This one was a Screaming Hoot!
posted on 09 Apr 2008The genius of the setup of this movie is the selection of Steven Dorff as the Lead character. He's a Stolid, no-nonsense actor who gives his characters a groundfloor solidity. You don't expect comedy from him.Then you surround him with mondo-splatter hilarity and just watch as "Ritchie" tries to dodge through the insanity and just GET OUT. His face is a character-study in "Jesus-WTF is going on here?" And that mein makes him the Straight-up Man for the entire Horror Hoot.This movie isn't just Funny. It's Hysterical! Special kudos to Jamie Foreman and Russel Smith (Peter & Yuri). They were like an Evil, Reversed Abbot & Costello. I haven't laughed like that in Decades to the kind of faultless, genius slapstick they brought back to the screen. It was the sort of funny that always made your mother wake up and order you to turn the TV Off because you were laughing so hard.This movie is GREAT with friends and Beer & Wine. Watch After Midnight.
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Unexpected , in a good way !
posted on 30 Aug 2009I thought this movie would be a Thriller/ Gangster flick , it started off that way and i though seems OK. I spotted Sean Pertwee as a Russian , and it grabbed my attention . The movie then started to change, Steven Doriff seemed serious ,as everyone did , then the humour came in , and once the film moves to Russia anything goes , and it does . It was Fresh, Funny , Gory in places and completely unexpected . I left the movie thinking "What the Hell" Laughing to myself , the movie was so different you have to see it , you just won't see whats coming !. I had to tell everyone about it without going into what actually happens { which is very difficult as you can imagine }.