Horror Hospital Movie
Storyline
TAGLINES
The Operation is a Success ... When the Patient Dies
A young singer from a very seventies band decides he needs a vacation, so he travels to a creepy mansion in the heart of rural England to have all his inhibitions removed. He meets up with a sweet innocent girl who is travelling there to meet her aunt, who turns out to be a nasty matron type person. Eventually, they arrive to discover nearly all the other hospital inhabitants to be under some kind of mind control, with big scars on their heads. Not being in the slightest bit disturbed by this, they proceed to have lots of sex. Other guests, meanwhile realise something is amiss, and try to escape only to be decapitated by some kind of killer car, or to be beaten to death by mad motorcyclists. Eventually realising something is up, our hero and heroine have a big fight scene with the bikers, two at a time, and escape in the villains car.
| Michael Gough | Dr. Christian Storm |
| Robin Askwith | Jason Jones |
| Vanessa Shaw | Judy Peters |
| Ellen Pollock | Aunt Harris |
| Dennis Price | Mr. Pollack |
| Skip Martin | Frederick |
| Kurt Christian | Abraham |
| Barbara Wendy | Millie |
| Kenneth Benda | Carter |
| Colin Skeaping | Bike Boy |
| George Herbert | Laboratory Assistant |
| Simon Lust | 'Mystic' Rock Group |
| Antony Balch |
4.90 out of 10 (346 votes)
Visitor Reviews
Delicious bad and simple '70's genre work.
posted on 19 Feb 2009The atmosphere of this movie is unmistakably '70's like, with ridicules hair-cuts and outfits. The movie is like many other genre movies from the '70's, meaning that it features nudity, lots of gore and yes also a dwarf. The movie further more of course also features some really bad sound and fake looking reddish '70's blood. The acting is below par, as you would expect, with the exception of course of Michael Gough, who's presence alone is good enough to uplift this movie. He is not as well known as a Peter Cushing or a Christopher Lee but his acting is always excellent.The movie is unnecessarily slow at times. Some sequences go on for too long without really adding something to the build up or the overall story and movie. It doesn't make the movie always flow really well and make the movie feel overlong, even though it's well below 2 hours short.The atmosphere and horror elements of the movie are rather good. The movie uses some nice and atmospheric settings and some effective but simple cinematography. Michael Gough also adds to the movie its atmosphere and horror, also with the help of his killing automobile and mysterious henchmen and other strange characters.The story itself is quite ridicules, mainly because it isn't going anywhere really. Therefor the movie perhaps makes a bit of a pointless impression but overall the movie is entertaining enough to consider this a simple and typically enjoyable '70's genre movie.Obviously a movie for fans only.4/10
Cheepo British "horror" with no redeeming features!
posted on 27 Jun 2008In Britain between the rise of Hammer Horror films, sometime around 1958 and the release of their version of 'Dracula', and the early/mid 1970's there were scores of cheep horror films released. These can, I believe, be placed into one of three categories, Low Budget Classic (ie the aforementioned 'Dracula', its stablemate of the same period 'Frankenstein', 'The Pit and The Pendulum' etc), Cult Films like 'Circus of Horrors', 'Scream and Scream Again' etc, and the outright awful! Guess which category I would place 'Horror Hospital'?! This film is simply ludicrous, far too illogical, even within the world it has created for itself, and so poorly put together that it gets nowhere near being a LBC, and falls so short of being a Cult that it is laughable.I am aware that it is difficult to view any horror film of any age by modern day standards, the genre has moved on so rapidly, and become so much more graphic, but even by comparing this film to its contemporaries it falls well short of any real horror and scares. Today it is about as scary as a wet weekend in Weston-Super-Mare (for non-Brits that is a seaside town in the west of England that is mainly populated by the over 60's!, a British equivalent of, say, Atlantic City!). The concept of a Health Farm - not even a proper hospital note! (the makers had to squeeze in a line of dialogue to justify the title!) - being used for experimentation on the feckless youth of the day - young people who, of course, no one will notice have gone missing (don't these kids have parents?) and turned into "zombies" (although as "zombies" I would have thought that Dr Storm would have found better things to use them for beyond that of acrobatics!) is beyond belief. To go into all the plot holes would take all day, but I have one question, why do all the thugs wear leathers and crash helmets all the time, even when in doors? (Apart, of course, to disguise the fact that at least one is a woman! When was the last time you saw a male thug clearly wearing lipstick?!) The one really big question about this mess of a film is this, just how did talented people like Michael Gough, Ellen Pollock and, most notably, Dennis Price, became embroiled in such rubbish? Wait... I have thought of one redeeming feature, albeit a personal one! Over the past few years I have become friends with a Mr Robert Dearberg. Guess who was the editor on this mess? Yep, my old mate Bob Dearberg, the one and same person! We spend a lot of time discussing the merits of this film, that movie etc, and often disagree. The next time Bob slags off a film I have enjoyed I can look him in the eyes and say just two words.. "Horror Hospital"...!
Hairy Holidays at Health Hospital
posted on 04 Oct 2007Nothing from Balch's experimental Burroughs films suggested he'd turn his hand to a horror film, nor does this film give any indication of what he'd previously been up to. It has more going on than a slasher of the 80s or 90s, and a beautiful location in the country, with interesting buildings. Cast is generally likable, though the film itself is on the silly side.On the commentary track for Secrets of Sex AKA Bizarre, also directed by Balch, Producer Richard Gordon indicates that for this film, they wanted to start with just a title. Balch came up with Horror Hospital, they worked out a scenario, and they hired screenwriters from there. Balch got Gough to act in the film after screening The Devil Bat (1940) for him, and asking him to play his role like Bela Lugosi in that film!
Super 70's horror comedy
posted on 16 Sep 2007Horror Hospital is an excellent slice of vintage British horror, produced in the early 70's when films were getting gorier (notice the numerous decapitations). Michael Gough is on top nasty form as a doctor who performs brain experiments (sound familiar?) on his young victims, and Robin Askwith is the unsuspecting youth caught up in his evil schemes. Dennis Price has an amusing cameo, and there's even a 70's guy called Abraham with big hair. Lots of comedy action scenes too with motorbike-helmet wearing leather-suited baddies. This is a must see!
Don't mention the war.
posted on 30 Jun 2007Thanks to the advent of DVD creators who see a buck in putting classics such as Horror Hospital on disc we are fortunate not to loose such a gem. The movie has everything. Mad doctor (in a wheelchair) person of small stature as assistant. Hard-faced matron who is in love with the good doctor, Sex, groovy chicks and guys, a rock band and a beautiful Gothic Mansion, that any true horror buff would love to reside in. So young guy Jason ripped off by his band and to add insult to injury gets his nose broken in the process, is told by his friends that a holiday would be just the shot. Pan to Hairy Holidays (I don't remember ads in papers being that amateurish) so off he trots. Meets Price who has a thing for young boys (but not thing enough to steer young Jason away from his next adventure) and off he goes to the Manor sans luggage. On the train he meets a charming young girl eating her meat paste sandwiches and after a decent amount of chat-up. Off they trot to the Manor. The stationmaster informs the Manor and they are picked up by 2 useful people in black leather gear and helmets (in the days before helmets where compulsory, and people rarely wore them) Now these 2 helmet wearing leather clad 'dudes' come in very useful and tend to have the ability to be in several places at once (check the credits out) So the Mad scientist and assistant have just decapitated 2 escapees with a very sharp blade that appears out the side of the car.(How it manages to be at the correct height to do this on every individual I don't quite understand...but hey!) Now Jason and his girl have become lovers as in such a huge mansion there is only one room available and they will have to share. Shining moments for me are the little persons eye acting, and the first visit to the dining room where white-faced zombiesque young people with visible scars sit sans conversation, sans motion, sans brain function and the two new residents find it only a little odd. Oh and back to the biker 'dudes' they fight, they get killed they appear out of everywhere and keep on keeping on (again see credits) The movie has some laugh out loud moments and I truly enjoyed it as you can watch it again and again. So for those interested see a naked girl and a shirtless guy. See a film regarding Dr's experiments where the light just does not hide the guys genitals. See a film with lots of horror, laughter and substance. A fun way to spend an evening. Pass the wine friend.
Get away with a Hairy Holiday!
posted on 07 Mar 2006Maybe some spoilers. Does anyone care?The plot: Frustrated songwriter Jason is lured out into the country for a holiday (on the advice of some very "zombie" sounding acquaintances in a club...). He meets Judy - a girl who's going to the same old mansion to see her long-lost aunt, who in turn used to run a brothel, but disapproved of Judy's mother because she wasn't married. They are met at the door by a midget(wearing a yamikah? not sure if it was meant that way - maybe just to cover his bald spot) and introduced to the spooky doctor who's supposed to cure all their hangups. They don't know that he does it through (dum-dum - scary music) lobotomy. Or some kind of similar brain experimentation - he's certainly not a plastic surgeon, since he leave a huge scar down the forehead of all his victims. He might just be trying to get all of "today's youth" under his evil thrall, but he's not very clear with expressing his actual GOALS during the exposition sequence when he reveals his evil master plan to Jason.Jason and Judy try to get away (before they have their brains operated on), with the help of a late arrival named Abraham who looks like what you'd get if Eric Estrada and Scott Baio had an illegitimate child - who then grew up on the Mod Squad.Actually, I liked the movie. I love cheesy horror, and this had just enough good black humor, creepy moments and amusing over the top acting to make it fun to watch. Favorite weird scene - near the beginning, when the midget is showing the two to their room, they look through an open door and see a bed covered - I mean SOAKED - with blood. The midget passes it off as "hope you two won't have any accidents" or some such. They ponder, but don't even ask what happened. Oh, that British lack of nosiness.Also, did anyone else notice that the gong-banging creepy-looking guy used for the closing credits on Elvira's hosted movies is actually the gong-banging creepy-looking midget sampled from this film??
Stunning Piece of British Deconstruction
posted on 21 Jan 2006This film is a wonder. If one was to happen across it one Sunday afternoon, sober and alone, one might struggle to immediately spot its worth.However, do NOT pass this film by. Director Balch has here crafted a masterclass in horror/b-movie aesthetic and inconsistency. The gleeful abandon with which the film disposes of continuity and good sense is a constant joy - it impossible not to shout "REWIND" every 10mins.Robin Askwith's frottage, Dennis Price's priceless mirror speech, the musical motorcycles, the guard Dalmatian, the zombie ticket-man, the slugman escape, the "sandwich incident", the hilarious incomprehensibility of Michael Gough's Doctor Storm's central plan, the delectable Judy Peter's, the greatest chat-up line in screen history (sadly unrepeatable here...) and one very fine facial performance after another from the diminutive Skip Martin.Please, rent or buy this film, grab a your mates and a crate of cheap beer and keep the remote control nearby - this film, from the same year as The Wicker Man and Don't Look Now, defines the genre with its aggressive deconstruction of horror clichés and sizzling script.
Tony what's the point?
posted on 30 Aug 2005There are few films that present no interest whatsoever, but this is one of them. There was better to be expected from Beat-related director Balch, who made at least three films in collaboration with William Burroughs (TOWERS OPEN FIRE, THE CUT-UPS, BILL AND TONY). Robin Askwith, a Mick Jagger lookalike, provides a lot of bad acting, and the rest of the cast do not fare better (the dwarf, in particular, is awful).The story could have been worthwhile in the hands of, say, Terence Fisher or Mario Bava, or even Jess Franco (who has explored similar themes), but Balch's film looks like no one cared. The only things we are left with are a strange cameo from Dennis Price and the properly creepy appearance of Michael Gough (SLEEPY HOLLOW).
Rocky Horror Inspiration
posted on 26 May 2005If Richard O'Brien, writer of the "Rocky Horror Picture Show", wasn't inspired to write his movie after seeing "Horror Hospital" I'd be very surprised. So many similar subjects: sexually active couple in old castle/mansion, leather clad bikers, gore, evil doctor, brain manipulated minions. Even the couple's arrival is almost a carbon copy of Brad and Janet's greeting by Riff Raff who is in this case a freaky dwarf (pc - little person). This movie was released in 73' which would have been just a year before he began the songs for his soon to be musical "Rock(y) Horror Show." This is a must see for any RHPS fans.
This is why the seventies made movies
posted on 07 Feb 2005This movie in itself is the evolution of hundreds of horrible seventies horror films. The plot doesn't exist, the characters are unbelievable and the comedy is juvenile. Some of my favorite scenes involve Fredrick, the Dwarf, and the fact that they spend 15 minutes of the movie making fun of the fact that he's short. First he moves the bodies, then he finds out he needs them again to be able to reach the lever on the door, so he piles them up, then he has to move them again to open the door. Fifteen minutes at least. Two things to note 1) the lightbulb in the Zombie flashback sex scene needed to be bigger, I did not rent this movie to see Zombie penis, 2) You would think that they would come up with a better ending than stealing it right out of The House of Wax with Vincent Price. The Decapitating Limo was a beautiful addition as well as the biker boys, even though one was obviously female. Captain Sask
A good slice of gory and goofy horror nonsense.
posted on 12 Nov 2003Jason (Robin Askwith) is in need of some R & R, and, through a company dubbed "Hairy Holidays", is sent to a country manor where much more ghoulish happenings occur. There's a hapless dwarf (a likable and funny Skip Martin), henchmen clad like motorcyclists, and a wheelchair-bound madman named Storm (the wonderful Michael Gough) who controls the minds of his victims. Jason determines to escape and prevent the intended fate of his cute and perky love interest Judy (the winsome Vanessa Shaw).This has to be seen to be believed. It's a campy, ridiculous, and gleefully sadistic trashy flick...not necessarily good in any way, but entertaining to watch. It's sure not going for any amount of credibility (wouldn't most people leave the moment they saw a bloody bed?) or any sort of real atmosphere or scares. No, it's the kind of thing that I have fun with, and laugh at, even if it's light on real "horror". Even a "big" revelation concerning the bad doctor comes as no surprise.It dives into the blissfully bloody mayhem right off the bat. Some folks might get a real gas out of the lethal decapitating limousine. Co-writer and director Antony Balch does serve up the evil escapades of his movie with a certain relish, and gives us a fairly decent finish to enjoy.Any movie that offers a deliciously hammy Gough chewing up the scenery is worth checking out, and he doesn't disappoint. There's also an amusing special appearance by Dennis Price as the sleazy Pollack.If you just want to have a good time with a horror flick that won't require you to think very hard, you might want to give this one a try.7/10
Possibly the worst film, but I couldn't stop watching.
posted on 08 Aug 2003This ranks as one of the most terrible films i've ever come across. Hidden away late at night, this little British ball of rubbish contains the following: AWFUL acting. AWFUL storyline. AWFUL progression. AWFUL photography. Actually, I don't think I can go on, because the AWFUL list is so huge, that it might take me a few days to write it all! The only safe place you can watch this film is at some ground zero in the desert, where it belongs, and where it should be blown up and erased from the face of the planet. HOWEVER, despite the terribleness and the teeth grinding ridiculousness of it, I could not stop watching. I suppose this film is just enjoyably awful. Whatever. I don't want to spare another moment of my life thinking about this film. I just lost and hour and twenty sitting through it. Watch with caution....
"Let's give him a piece of his own medicine." You have to see it to believe it, outrageously entertaining horror or confused rubbish?
posted on 28 May 2003Horror Hospital starts with a black Rolls Royce parked in some woods somewhere in England. Dr. Storm (Micheal Gough) cracks his knuckles as he waits in the back with his assistant, a dwarf named Frederick (Skip Martin). A teenage couple are seen running through the woods covered in bloodied bandages, the Roller pulls up behind the escaping duo & a couple of sharp blades shoot out of the side of the car & as it catches the fleeing patients up & drives past the blades decapitate them both & their heads are caught in sacks also attached to the side of the Roller, this is a fantastic sequence by the way! Jason Jones (Robin Askwith) decides to leave the 'Mystic' rock group after they stole one of his songs & a fight broke out. Jason notices an advert for 'Hairy Holidays' & feels the time is right for a break so he wanders down an alleyway in London (NOT a good thing to do...) where the Hairy Holidays office's are located & meets Mr. Pollack (Dennis Price) the gay owner. After a brief sales pitch Jason decides to go to Brittlehurst Manor, a relaxing health resort. On the train Jason meets Judy Peters (Venessa Shaw) who is also on her way to Brittlehurst Manor to meet her Aunt Harris (Ellen Pollack) for the first time. But once there what they find is beyond their wildest (drug induced) dreams! The insane wheelchair bound Dr. Storm & his wife Aunt Harris, zombified teenagers, murder, a strange abused dwarf servant, biker helmet wearing guards, blood stained sheets that look as if someone has been slaughtering cattle on them, axe's hanging on the walls, water that runs red with blood & only one available room which they have to share. It soon becomes clear to both Jason & Judy that Dr. Storm has some unusual methods of treatment...This English exploitation/horror film was co-written & directed by Antony Blach who also has an uncredited cameo in the film as a bearded man in the club, I thought Horror Hospital was a bizarre film that feels like it has everything but the kitchen sink, they don't, won't or can't make 'em like this any more! The script by Blach & Alan Watson is a real mess, there's guards dressed as bikers for some reason, a Rolls Royce which decapitates people, zombified back flipping teenagers, dwarfs, a deadly bog in the middle of an English wood, a deformed monster who likes to whip naked girls, brain operations, flashbacks, gay holiday salesmen, a rock group with a thieving transvestite lead singer, a weird train station attendant, severed heads in a water tank, a shower scene involving someone wearing a Knight's steel helmet & a real overriding sense of bizarreness throughout. In fact sometimes it feels like too much is happening, Dr. Storm's motives are never made clear & as a whole Horror Hospital is all over the place even though it has some great ideas it doesn't quite know what to do with them as it tries to stuff as much into it's 88 minutes as possible. This, as it happens, is a good thing though as it moves along like a rocket, is never dull or boring & is just so entertaining to watch if you take it in the right way. Horror Hospital is not set in any sort of Hospital I recognise, it was obviously shot in a stately house somewhere that has a basement lab for Dr. Storm next to the basement gym. After a fantastic opening sequence Horror Hospital loses it's way more & more as it progresses, it becomes more confused & feels more padded as it reaches it's predictably bizarre ending. At least Blach & his crew tried to make something a bit different & they certainly succeeded. Horror Hospital is one of those unique films I could probably talk about all day analysing it & pointing to various scenes that stay in the memory. A lot of Horror Hospital is very tongue-in-cheek & for the most part it thankfully doesn't seem to take itself too seriously. It's also very camp & garish, it's a real product of the early 70's, just check out Askwith's hairdo & clothes! Horror Hospital contains little in the way of blood or gore, the brain operation is off screen for the most part but that wonderful decapitating Roller provides some severed heads & gore when it pops up. Gough is good as the mad scientist but everyone else is rather undistinguished in their roles. Technically Horror Hospital is basic & a bit crude at times but more than acceptable & it gives the film yet another bizarre extra dimension. Overall I had tremendous fun with Horror Hospital but if your looking for a serious scary horror film then forget it, watch a Hammer Dracula or Frankenstein if you want serious British horror. Still with me? In that case make sure you check this out if just for laughs only of which there are many, definitely a unique viewing experience & a film everyone should see at least once...
It's just an invitation to make a reservation....
posted on 01 Apr 2003Another story of mad scientist who uses rock musicians as guinea pigs for his experiments?If we look below the surface of the trite screenplay we could see the revenge of the establishment against those hairy young men and the horrible sounds they make ,their silly ideas of peace and love ....What saves this flick is its black humor:from the very first line about keeping the car clean to the girl's family 's racy past:Wasn't her auntie the owner of a brothel in Hamburg ?Wasn't her mom an unwed mother? and hadn't the aunt a lot of nerve to call her names? Michael Gough is the sinister-looking saw bone;the aforementioned aunt is his assistant (sounds like Franju's classic :"Les Yeux Sans Visages" aka "Eyes without a face" );and the rockers provide the raw material.It is not food for thought but it's rather entertaining if you do not demand too much.
Absurd garbage? You bet!
posted on 22 Jan 2003A worn out musician decides to take break and go a relaxing vacation. He chooses to stay at health farm located out in the country and on the way there, he meets a girl on the train going to the same place to see her aunty. The mysteriously mean, but crippled Dr. Storm, who's performing brain surgery on the holidaymakers and turning them into his obedient zombies, runs the resort. When the two teens find out about his insane experiments and learn that's their fate. They go out of their way to get away. But they not only have the doctor to face, but also his dwarf sidekick, an army of leather wearing zombies and that of a hideous monster.Just wait a second, as I just pick up my jaw from the ground. Now, what was that all about!? "Horror Hospital" has got to be one of the most ridiculous and over-exaggerated horror films that I've ever came across, but you know what? I had a real ball with this blend of macabre and camp! That's high camp of a VERY demented type. The praise that I've given makes it sound great and I had a good old time with it. Although, don't be expecting anything particularly fresh and this deranged piece is one downright messy film that doesn't have any idea of the word coherence. So from that point it recycles the same old formula and leaves a lot of things up in the air. The clichés and predictability flows freely, without any sort of constraints. Also forget about logic in the script and story as that's thrown out of the window for absurd situations that don't make much sense. Actually the whole film doesn't make a whole a lot of sense, with the so many potholes and laziness. There's so much going on in the plot that there's such vagueness to everything and the problem is it tries to squeeze too much madness without explaining what happen before it and how it came to that situation. But all is forgiven because it's so abnormal and hugely enjoyable. So, just go with the flow because if you try to decipher what's going on, you'll receive a splitting headache for your troubles. The whole mysterious awe about what's going is just so hard to shake that I couldn't keep my eyes off it.The actual story is no more then a melodrama disguised as a Gothic shocker, which spurts along some exploitation and black humour along the way. Actually, the whole thing turns into a black farce with everything being poked fun at and the blood splattering is pretty much in a comic book state. Because of that the violence isn't particularly gruesome and it doesn't make you squirm, but the gratuitous bloodletting and nudity does run freely. Damn those leather-clad zombies really do like to hand out a beating! The great thing about it is that everyone involved knows how stupid it really is and don't take the thing so seriously. The performances are plain awful and purely amateurish to say the least. But it's Michael Gough's hellishly campy performance that steals the lime light as the crazy Doctor and Skip Martin as Frederick the dwarf adds a cheeky vibe to the film. The dialogue joins it with its ineptness. But even though these things are terrible there's some energy amongst it and you can't go wrong with the tongue-in-cheek approach it takes. Another strong feature is that of the setting. The resort, which more looks like a castle on the inside, has an oppressive awe about it and the grand Gothic exterior makes it look larger and menacing than it really is. Being isolated in the countryside helps provide such a brood atmosphere too. Although, it's definitely hilariously bad, it still does have its eerie moments worked in. Also the robust score builds on the suspense and uneasiness greatly and the soundtrack is reasonably groovy. Well, what do expect from that era. Really, this is purely utter ham that breathes sadism and sleaze in a very cheap way.No way can you call this a good film, because it's not. The aim of the flick is to entertain with it being heavily laced with bloody, sleazy and humorous context. Even if the production is pure rubbish, it does it effectively enough that I can see this becoming a guilty pleasure of mine. Only for people who really enjoy camp horror and if you do, you're in for one big treat.
Inept Horror Movie
posted on 01 Mar 2002A lot of people seem to be under the impression that this film is a deliberate attempt at doing a blackly comical horror movie and I guess the opening dialogue of " Look at that faggot . He thinks he's Greta Garbo but he looks like a lemon meringue pie " does give the impression that HORROR HOSPITAL is tongue in cheek but I think it's a just an awful movie Take Judy's introduction scene where she meets Jason on the train ( And lets ignore the fact of how this defies statistical odds ) where she feels uncomfortable in the company of the laddish bloke but for reasons known only to the screenwriter tells both Jason and the audience her entire life story . Yeah I know it's exposition but couldn't it have been done in a more logical manner ? In fact that's the serious problem with the movie there's no type of internal or external logic . Dr Storm gets pushed about in a wheelchair but it's revealed at the end that he never needed a wheelchair in the first place so why has he spent most of the running time in one ? Why haven't the relatives of the lobotomised zombies tracked their loved ones down with the exception of Millie's boyfriend ? These and a hundred other questions are never answered and while HORROR HOSPITAL never really takes itself too seriously that's no excuse for delivering a screenplay ridden with plot holes The directing isn't much better and feels like it was filmed in a cheap and cheerless manner by film students . The female characters of Judy and Millie are played by very pretty girls but unfortunately it's obvious their talents as actresses are non existent which makes me think they were only cast because they were the only females the producers could get who were willing to appear naked . Robin Askwith is alright as Jason but did we expect an Oscar worthy performance ? And I'm afraid Michael Gough is totally wasted . Gough could have been one of Britain's greatest actors of the 20th Century but his undoubted talents were wasted in appearing in total garbage like this , KONGA , TROG and SATAN'S SLAVE . Perhaps the quality of this movie can be summed up by the title credits which read " Guest starring Dennis Price " . When you've got a movie advertising cast members you've never heard of that's always a bad sign
They Don't Make 'Em Like This Anymore!
posted on 13 Nov 2001This is another film I remember from childhood, from the days of regular TV (free, broadcast, and adjust the "rabbit ears" for reception), as a crappy but atmospheric British monster picture.Now, not only on cable, but on a premium service, I came across it again - and in letterbox format no less. Well, the film is still basically very flawed, but it really shows how much better crafted films once were.While it remains a simplistic lots of onscreen gore effort, this picture is so much more beautiful to look at than many produced today. The cinematography is consistently superior, and well supported by excellent lighting and generally well scored music. And even though the special effects don't match up to todays films they retain some value in that they have more visual "weight" than some of the CGI crap routinely inserted in modern movies.Unfortunately the wacky plot and mediocre (well, sometimes bad) acting show through in the end. It may be that the director was trying for a lot of humor at points but it only worked for me towards the end of the film when one of those fleeing the burning building stops for a snack in the kitchen.As for the beheading car mentioned in another review: that particular element is worthy of Austin Powers' "Dr. Evil." I can see the good doctor in this movie also calling out "All I'm asking for is for some frickin' sharks with lasers on their heads."If you've seen this before on broadcast TV, it may be worth a second look on video or DVD for the cinematography and for the sexual elements which explain the plot a little more. In the TV version I saw as a kid, the sexual theme was not at all evident, and so, the plot seemed even more outlandish than it actually is.Still, if you happen by this big-time cable it may catch your interest, but all the way along you'll wonder why any premium channel could have chosen this film from their catalog. There are quite simply so many more old British shockers which are better than Horror Hospital."-SCG
Delightfully funny, cheesy, and quintessentially British 70's Sex Horror Comedy.
posted on 01 Oct 2000Those who deprecate this film for its wooden acting, improbable plot, ridiculous dialogue, and dire special effects are missing the point. It's a romp. More tongue-in-cheek spoof of Hammer Horror than anything else, this openly silly flick is fabulously enjoyable. Just don't expect to be scared, because it's meant to be ludicrous. The scene of a dwarf (the superb Skip Martin) arranging a pair of drugged biker guards in order to use them as a stepladder is brilliantly funny, and evokes classic comedy from the era of Vaudeville. Laurel & Hardy, Bob Hope, and Abbot & Costello also appeared in tongue-in-cheek "scary" movies of a similar ilk, but this quintessentially British product throws in a cheerful dollop of seaside-postcard "Carry On" style foolishness with Robin Askwith from the "Confessions of ..." sex comedy series.Enjoy!
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Deliciously grotesque 70's horror flick!
posted on 09 Aug 2009Elderly horror films starring Michael Gough as a dangerously insane butcher are always great fun, since the gore is so over-the-top and the story lines are so hilariously inept. Just look at "Horrors of the Black Museum" or "Satan's Slave", for example! It simply seems that casting Michael Gough inevitably results in a horror film that can't possibly be taken serious. "Horror Hospital" lifts up this theory to an even higher level of grotesquerie, as the plot is indescribably absurd, Gough's character is more demented than ever and the script is just filled with goofs, stupidities and illogicalness! Michael Gough is Doctor Christian Storm, supposedly a brilliant disciple of Pavlov once, but now a crippled lunatic who enjoys swooping off people's heads with his Rolls Royce (now there's one killing method you have to see in order to believe!). Although he's not very good at it, Storm attempts to control and master human feelings of sexuality so he performs brain-operations on youngsters and keeps their zombified leftovers locked away in his rural castle. You can't really be too harsh on this film, since writer/directed Antony Balch clearly opted for a light-headed and comical tone. Cliché after cliché is unscrupulously presented while the violence (although plenty of it) is never shocking or disturbing. Not once during the whole film I really understood what exactly Storm is trying to achieve with his operations (my best guess is that he wants to copulate with the female patients after disfiguring their brains), but I gladly witnessed how he cut open their heads and served the brains on a plate for them to see! The castle (referred to in the movie as a "health-farm") is a great horror setting and there are a couple of very ingenious gimmicks. The most fun definitely is to track down all the things in "Horror Hospital" that don't make the slightest bit of sense: the machete attached to the car can't possibly reach someone's head (unless they were all midgets like Skip Martin) and Storm's biker-henchmen just seem to keep on coming, like they're appearing out of nowhere. This movie is one of those exquisite British horror oddities released during the early 70's; too silly to be produced by Hammer but way too much fun to forget about them entirely. Watch it when you can!